I am a creature of habit, and one of my habits to get my day started is by reading certain blogs. I do this every morning before I start actually working. Being a mom of boys I like to read boy mom blogs, and as a cop's wife I obviously like to read cop's wife blogs. One particular post that I read got me thinking. She posted about 5 myths to being a doctors wife (read it here you will appreciate the humor and honesty that it gives as do the majority of the post-the others are about food). This got me to thinking, what are myths about being a cop's wife. There are several both funny and not so funny that come to mind.
1)Myth:
If my husband stops you, then you can say oh, your Janelle's husband and that will get you out of a ticket.
Truth:
If my husband stops you and you reference me, all that will do is get you sitting on the side of the road longer with him asking how you know me. In fact, if my husband is the officer that stops you, you most likely deserved it because he is one of the few officers that I know that hates writing tickets, because it just leads to more paperwork. Who really wants to spend their day doing paperwork.
2) Myth:
We own stock in doughnuts...
Truth:
It is OK to admit to the fact that we all make police jokes about cops eating doughnuts. It is the most common thing they get picked on, you know it, I know it. I have joked with Hubs a few times about it. The sad reality is that in my house he will be the last one to eat a doughnut (unless they are the homemade fried biscuit kind that you dip in powdered sugar and who can resist those). You can walk in my house at any given point and time and would not find doughnuts. The kids went through a brief stage of wanting the powdered sugar kind (Hello Sweet Sixteen!!) but after dealing with cleaning up the mess and all that, they are a rare purchase as well. Now I can't speak for all LEO households but I can for mine and that is our truth.
3) Myth:
The radio (scanner which ever you prefer to call it) stays on all the time.
Truth:
It is never on at my house unless he has come home for a meal and is still on duty, or is getting ready, or if he gets a call that says hey we have this and this going on we may need you to come back to work. I have a firm rule that when we are home we are home. We do not talk about work unless it is something that is going to directly effect our family. When we are home it is family time. When he was a road officer and worked nights, I refused to listen to a scanner. I finally was asked why I didn't listen by a non LEO wife I simply explained that 1) I have a house to tend to and two children running around, and didn't want the extra noise. Reason 2) is the most honest sincere police wife answer I could give. I don't want to hear my husband get shot in the event something happens. Plain and Simple. If something happens that I need to know I will be told. Until then ignorance is bliss.
4) Myth:
I can't sleep when he works nights.
Truth:
Here again this is applies to my household only, I can not speak for other wives. When my husband and I first got married and he went back to work he was on night shift. So I started out sleeping in our bed with him not home. I never had an issued with not sleeping good with him not home. Along came the kids and one of our boys refused to sleep when his dad wasn't home unless he was in our bed. It was the only time he wanted to sleep in the big bed. So he did, mostly so I could sleep. Then the kids got bigger and started staying in there beds and Hubs still worked nights as part of his rotation. I still slept amazing. I got the whole bed. I wasn't being routed out of my side of the bed (after almost 10 years he still takes up the whole bed). I on occasion looked forward to him being on night shift. I could get to bed at a normal hour and get a good solid night's sleep. Now that he is home every night and weekend, it is a bit different. When he gets called back into work late at night it takes me a bit longer to go back to sleep mostly because I know something is wrong. But I can finally fall asleep and sleep nicely. Basically I can sleep no matter what, or where.
5) Myth:
Cops make mega bucks.
Truth:
Pardon me while I roll on the floor laughing hysterically. This is a myth of epic proportion. You will NEVER hear a cop say they do it for the money. If they do, then they must be minimalist. Please never be disillusioned enough to think that any amount of money is worth risking your life. LEOs along with soldiers are both highly underpaid and under appreciated. Most LEO families that I know are 2 income families just because well you can't make it off of one. I am not sure who came up with that idea but they are so so SO wrong.
6) Myth:
The dangers of the job don't phase you.
Truth:
I think this is one place I can speak for all spouses no matter what their LEO does. The dangers of the job are always in your mind. However if you dwell on it, you will in fact drive yourself crazy. You know that every time they walk out the door they are just one call away from possibly not coming home. That is why when they leave for work, you need to always tell them you love them, just in case. You learn to make the most of the time you have together. LEO life and families learn that it is more about quality time than quantity time. You learn what counts and what doesn't. Yes, I worry. Yes, there have been times I have been to worried to sleep. Yes, we have been in restaurants and he has had to run out because of a chase and it scares the crap out of me. More than anything I know this is what he was meant to do and where he is suppose to be and that gives you a bit more peace of mind.
